Parent coaching composite example
Supporting Yard-Time Participation
A strengths-based, neuroaffirming example of looking beyond behaviour and asking what helps a child take part more safely and successfully in unstructured school play.
This composite example draws on a combination of cases. It does not describe one identifiable child. It illustrates occupational therapy reasoning and coaching. The focus is on participation, the environment and practical support rather than asking the child to manage every difficulty alone.
Start with strengths
Who is this child?
Understanding what matters to the child gives us a much better starting point than beginning with the difficult moments.
Interest
Football lover
Passionate about the game and enthusiastic about playing with peers.
Connection
Wants to join in
Actively wants to be included and play alongside classmates.
Values
Strong sense of fairness
Notices quickly when something feels unfair or inconsistent.
Communication
Communicates through action
Movement and doing often communicate more clearly than words in the moment.
Support
Thrives with clarity
Clear, consistent and predictable expectations help participation.
Family knowledge
Known deeply at home
His family know his strengths, patterns and the kinds of support that tend to help.
Listen first
What his family already knew
Parent coaching starts with what the family already understands about the child and everyday life.
What they were seeing
- He loved football and talked about it often.
- He genuinely wanted to play with peers.
- He sometimes opted out or played alone when the situation felt unsafe or too unpredictable.
- He often communicated most clearly through movement and action.
What they knew helped
- Clear, predictable rules and routines.
- Knowing what was happening and when it would change.
- Concrete, body-based language.
- A trusted adult who responded consistently.
The OT lens
From behaviour to participation
The working formulation
“This is not simply a behaviour problem. There is a mismatch between what the child needs to participate and what the yard environment is asking him to manage.”
The yard involved
- No consistent structure or routine.
- Shifting and unspoken social rules.
- Complex role negotiation in real time.
- High noise, movement and unpredictability.
- Very limited alternatives to football.
- An abrupt transition back to class.
His responses made sense because
- Predictability appeared to help him take part.
- Unspoken rules were harder to access without explicit teaching.
- Fairness violations felt genuinely important to him.
- Opting out sometimes protected him from an overwhelming situation.
- His body often communicated what words did not in those moments.
Look for exceptions
When participation already worked
A useful coaching question
“Tell me about a time it went well.”
The family described times when the rules had been explained clearly beforehand, a trusted adult was nearby, and the child knew what was happening and when it would end.
The practical question became: how do we build more of those conditions into ordinary yard time?
Two-track plan
Change the environment and build useful skills
The main emphasis was on making the setting more accessible, while also giving the child practical ways to ask for help, pause and rejoin.
Making yard time easier to access
- Clear rules shared before yard.
- A fair and transparent way to choose games.
- One structured alternative to football.
- A predictable line-up plan.
- A named adult with a consistent response.
- Preparation when plans changed.
Building the child’s toolkit
- Noticing body signals in language that worked for him.
- Ready-to-use scripts such as “I need help” or “I need a break”.
- Knowing how and when to ask for adult support.
- A planned break as support, not a consequence.
- A simple body-based safety reminder.
- Brief reflection after play, once things were calm.
Shared language
The home-school partnership plan
Consistency mattered more than adding lots of strategies.
At school
- Share clear rules before yard.
- Offer one structured alternative play option.
- Use a consistent line-up plan.
- Agree a calm adult response when he asks for help.
At home
- Offer a body check-in if helpful: “What do you notice?”
- Practise short help or break scripts in calm moments.
- Keep safety language clear and matter-of-fact.
- Reflect on what went well and what might help next time.
Review
Noticing what is working
Review focused on participation and the conditions around it, rather than asking whether the child looked calm.
Which changes made the biggest practical difference?
What was different about those times?
Did joining in feel more enjoyable or manageable?
What should stay, change or be simplified?
What in the environment or support made that possible?
What might be the next small adjustment to try?
The Belong OT coaching pathway
A simple sequence for moving from the family’s concerns to practical changes in everyday life.
Need practical support with participation?
Belong OT works with families to understand what is getting in the way, identify useful changes and build support into real routines.